Life is uncertain and Death is certain

Life is uncertain, but death is certain.

Death is a great teacher of life existence. The healthiest, the strongest, the happiest, the wealthiest, the kindest, the greatest, the most intelligent and knowledgeable, the most talented, successful and famous, or the most loved and respected, will also have to bow down to DEATH.

There’s no guarantee about anything in this worldly life existence of uncertainty, but for sure, death will come one day, sooner or later, regardless of whether it’s natural cause or unnatural cause, intentional or unintentional, expected or unexpected, slowly or instantly, wittingly or unwittingly, having none/few/many friends, having an easy life or difficult life, being ignorant or wise, have done none/few/many good actions or bad actions, have been good or bad/right or wrong/positive or negative/happy or unhappy/healthy or unhealthy. Everyone is dying immediately following the moment of birth, but most people either don’t realize this or they trying to be positive and hope for the best. Death is not a bad or negative thing at all.

“Tribute to my big brother who had lived a difficult but great honest life, who was content and generous, who was forbearing and forgiving, who had been smiling through all the hardships, who had delivered all his duties and responsibilities as a great son, a great brother, a great husband and a great friend to many beings, who had been sacrificed greatly to be looking after our family during the difficult time, and looking after our beloved bedridden father unconditionally for many years until he left the world. And now, my big brother had left this world without any painful suffering but with a smile on his face on the 30th of June 2019. Thank you brother.”

Self-esteem and confidence

Any issues regarding self-esteem and confidence shouldn’t and doesn’t need to be existing at all. But due to ignorance and egoism, many people depend on self-esteem and confidence to be who they are, to be happy and feel meaningful, or not. Many people are suffering from mild to severe low self-esteem or low confidence that leads to the sense of meaninglessness and depression. Even many mental and psychological related studies and professionals also preach, think and believe that the development and empowerment of self-esteem and confidence is very important in life existence as human beings and it’s the key to personal and global growth, success and happiness.

Real confidence has nothing to do with self-esteem or confidence that builds on physical appearance, condition, ability and achievement, or mental state, ability and achievement, or desirable and undesirable life experiences, or good and bad relationships with parents, family, friends and the rest of the world. It is beyond all these names and forms, when the mind has gone beyond the identification of what the mind thinks is ‘I’ and ‘my’, where this identification of ‘I’ and ‘my’ with the different qualities of names and forms is just a by-product of the worldly thinking and belief, or family, cultural, social and religious belief.

It’s the ego that feels it has to be good enough for something, or for somebody, or for oneself. It also feels that it might be not good enough for something, or for somebody, or for oneself, based on what the thinking and belief recognize as ‘good’ and ‘good enough’, or what is ‘self-esteem and confidence’, ‘success’, ‘happiness’ and ‘meaningfulness’, and the relationship between them, where most people think and believe that ‘high self-esteem and confidence’ is related to ‘success’, and ‘success’ is related to ‘happiness’, while ‘happiness’ is related to ‘meaningfulness’. And many people are suffering because of this thinking and belief or trying to live up to this thinking and belief for their entire life, and passing this thinking and belief from generation to generation.

It’s the idea of ‘I’, or the ego, that needs to feel good about oneself, and wants other people to perceive oneself as good enough, and needs to attain or possess certain qualities of names and forms to be identifying with, that would make one feels good and proud of oneself and also would make other people feel good and proud of oneself, in order to be happy and live life meaningfully.

And all these qualities of names and forms are impermanent and there is no ‘I’ to be found in any of these names and forms, or to be in control of the impermanent changes, to be the way that ‘I’ like it to be. No matter how much influences we can influence the condition of the physical body and the state of the mind, to maintain the function and the life span of the body and the mind, the body and mind will still have to go through inevitable changes of decay, old age, discomfort, illness, weakness, ceased functioning, and decompose, or death.

Once the mind fully understood this, it will be free from the bondage of self-esteem and confidence. There’s no ‘I’ being good or not good enough. There’s neither high nor low self-esteem. There’s neither high nor low confidence.

One doesn’t need to be somebody with particular appearance, condition, ability or achievement, or have certain good and positive life experiences, or good relationships with anyone, in order to feel confident, happy, satisfied or meaningful.

One can have and appreciate all the attention, affection, support, agreement, acknowledgement, love or companionship that is available in the present, but one doesn’t need other people’s attention, affection, support, agreement, acknowledgement, love or companionship in order to feel confident, love, happy or meaningful. If all these qualities of names and forms are not available, one is still happy and peaceful as one is. One doesn’t feel lack of something or missing out anything, or one is not good enough to deserve love, happiness and meaningfulness.

And that’s real confidence. One doesn’t need to be confident or satisfied about oneself at all. One doesn’t need to feel proud of oneself, and doesn’t need other people to feel proud of oneself, to be ‘I’, or the good ‘I’, the successful ‘I’, the happy ‘I’, the meaningful ‘I’. One is happy and peaceful as one is, without any identification with any quality as ‘I’.

There is no thinking or identification of “I am a good and kind human being. I want to do good and be kind and be able to contribute towards humanity.” but goodness, kindness and contribution towards humanity are being manifested and performed through the body and mind out of wisdom and compassion.

If one doesn’t know this, one will always looking for or craving for attaining and possessing certain qualities of names and forms that one would like to relate oneself with, to be identifying with, to feel good and satisfied about oneself, to boost up one’s self-esteem and confidence to be who ‘I’ am, thinking that by attaining and possessing such qualities of names and forms will also make other people to give them the attention, affection, support, agreement, acknowledgement, love or companionship that they want from other people, in order to be happy and feel meaningful. But then one is not free. And that’s one’s freedom of thinking and action.

Be free.

Do something that will make us happy?

We hear this “positive and motivational” message very often – “Do something that will make us happy.”

There’s nothing wrong about want to make ourselves (or the mind) happy by doing something that we (the mind) like to do, that will give us (the mind) some sorts of satisfaction and happy feelings, or to get rid of dissatisfaction and unhappy feelings. But know that if we need to depend on doing something that we like to do, or depend on certain qualities of names and forms to be happy, then it is not what yoga practice is about.

Yoga practice is unattached towards any qualities of names and forms, and be free from craving and aversion which is the cause of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. When the mind is free from dissatisfaction and unhappiness, when the mind is not being dissatisfied or unhappy, it doesn’t need to do something to get rid of dissatisfaction and unhappiness, or depend on any qualities of names and forms to be happy.

It’s about knowing how to be happy as we are, undetermined by any qualities of names and forms, impermanent changes, what we do or don’t do, and what we have or don’t have, to be happy, or not.

Om shanti.

Know our minds…

The mind never showed interest in something that was always there until the moment it sees, or found some other forms of qualities that it likes, or admires, or attracted to, which directly or indirectly exist along with that particular thing, it starts to show great interest in that thing.

Just like in any kinds of relationships among people, including friendships. We never showed interest in some people whom we know for a long time, until the moment we start to see, or found some other forms of qualities that we like and interested in, which directly or indirectly exist along with these people, and then we start to show interest in these people.

This indicates that we don’t really like nor interested in these people as they are, nor interested in these people for being who they were in the past, or who they are in the present moment, but we only like and interested in some qualities that we like and which drawn our mind’s interest.

Look within, and rest in our very own nature of unconditional love and peace. Love all beings as they are, be free from craving, longing, attachment, possessiveness, projection and expectation. We will never feel disappointed and hurt, or be disappointed and hurt by anyone or anything, when we start to understand how the mind works.

Only those minds that are free from ignorance and egoism know how to love others and be loved by others as it is unconditionally, in any relationships. All the others are just loving themselves for what they like and want, selfishly…

Be happy.

May all be peaceful, be happy…

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May all be peaceful, be happy…

 

When we have hatred towards some other people or some teachings that our mind disagrees with, the one whom we hate and disagree with will not be affected nor determined by our hatred and disagreement, but ourselves will be disturbed and hurt physically, mentally and emotionally by the hatred in our mind.

May those who are very unhappy and have hatred towards some teachings that they disbelieve, or towards others whom they don’t like and disagree with, be peaceful and be happy.

It doesn’t matter if we think we are better human beings than others, or we think we have better values and understanding than others, or we think we have higher realization than others, as long as we have hatred in our mind, we are not free.

Om shanti.

Know what we really really want, and be free…

It doesn’t matter who and what we think we are, or what we want ourselves to be, we can call ourselves ‘this’ or ‘that’, and tell ourselves and other people what type of life we want, or we can tell different things about ourselves and what we want to different people, it really doesn’t mean that ‘this’ is who we really are. Only ourselves will know what is going on in our mind, and what the ego really wants to do and what it truly desires. And we can give in to the ego and let the ego leads this life existence based on its desires and craving. Or we can be determined to develop non-attachment and self-control, and be free from being influenced or over-powered by the egoism and its desires. There’s no good nor bad, right or wrong. It is about what we really want for ourselves, for this life existence. Be happy.

When we feel unhappy, troubled or depressed being disturbed by some “problems” or about some “difficult” decisions that we need to make, actually all these are because we don’t know what we really want, and we have fear of taking the responsibility for the consequences of our actions and the responsibility of making a decision. Before we get what we think we want, and after we got what we think we want, we are not satisfied, not happy, and in doubts, because we don’t know what we really want.

It doesn’t matter how we identify ourselves by specie, gender, sexuality, family background, social group, race, nationality, culture, thinking, belief, religious status, education type or level, social status, appearance, living condition, life style, personality, characteristic, behavior, financial status, possession, relationship, and etc, it makes no difference when we are ignorant about the truth of who we really are, and we attach strongly onto all these qualities to be who we are, as all these identifications with many qualities of names and forms to be who we are, is not really who we really are. And ignorance doesn’t stop at the point where we identify ourselves with all these qualities to be who we are, but this life existence, confidence, self-worth, happiness and meaningfulness are also being determined by all these qualities.

For example, we are determined by the impermanent conditions and abilities of the physical body and the mind with certain qualities of names and forms to feel good and confident about ourselves, or we are determined by other people’s judgment towards ourselves to feel good and confident about ourselves, or we are determined by other people’s liking, friendship, support, agreement, acknowledgment, affirmation and social interaction to feel good and meaningful about life and ourselves, or we are determined by how intelligent or how attractive we are to feel confident about ourselves, or we are determined by whether we are able to do what we like to do, and no need to be doing anything that we don’t like to do to feel happy or not. And so on…

There’s nothing wrong with all these worldly identification, thinking and behavior coming from the egoism. But we are not free, being disturbed and affected by the impermanent changes of qualities of names and forms to be meaningful, happy and confident or not. And this will affect our relationship with our own self and with others. As whether we will like and accept ourselves or not, and whether we will be satisfied in a single intimate relationship or not, is being affected and determined by the forever dissatisfaction about ourselves, as well as the craving for having the qualities that we would like ourselves to have, but we don’t have in the reality.

When we practice yoga and meditation, we are letting go of all these attachment and identification with impermanent qualities of names and forms.

The entire life existence is free from being determined by all these impermanent qualities of names and forms to be meaningful, happy and confident.

When egoism and ignorance disappears, there’s no “I” existing. There’s no necessity to be identified as ‘somebody’ with certain qualities of names and forms, to feel good or confident about oneself, or “I”. The mind is peaceful as it is because it is no longer being determined by any qualities of names and forms that is impermanent, that is not in the control of “I”, that is dissatisfying, that is not who it really is…

Be free.

Om shanti.

Be bold, if we want to be ambitious…

If we are ambitious to do something, then be ready for positive and negative reactions, feedback or response. Be bold.

If we only welcome ‘supportive’ and ‘positive’ response or compliments, but do not want any ‘unsupportive’ and ‘negative’ response or criticism, as it will influence us and determine our self-confidence, and make us feel angry or feel bad about ourselves, then don’t do anything. Don’t be ambitious.

It will save ourselves and others some unnecessary troubles. Or else we will be angry and unhappy when we receive some ‘negative’ feedback, and other people who come in contact with us also will be affected by our angry and unhappy vibrations.

Om shanti.