Who is being unhappy and wants to be happy?

It’s the ego that is being unhappy and wants to be happy. Minds that are free from ignorance and egoism is peaceful and joyful as it is and don’t need to feel good and meaningful, or to be happy.

Most minds will try to do something that they like and enjoy, and to achieve something that they want to achieve, to feel good and happy and meaningful.

There’s also nothing wrong with people want to do good and be kind to others because it makes them feel good and happy, but, that’s not the teaching or practice of yoga.

Yoga practice is not about trying to do something to make the ego feels good and happy and meaningful (as this is empowering the ego and egoism) but, it’s to remove the root cause of unhappiness – ignorance and egoism. Once the root cause of unhappiness is eliminated, one will be happy as one is.

When the mind is free from egoism of attachment, identification, desire of craving and aversion, and expectation, one will be peaceful and happy as one is. One doesn’t need to do something, or not do something, to feel good and happy or meaningful. One doesn’t need to take intoxication/alcohol/drugs or to achieve certain results, social status and network, health condition, fitness level, body image, physical and mental ability and good relationships, to feel good and happy and meaningful. One doesn’t need other people’s love, acceptance, support, acknowledgment, recognition, friendliness and companionship, or any entertainment, enjoyment, achievement and success to be happy or feel good and meaningful.

The teaching and practice of yoga is to abandon all these egoism, one will be peaceful and happy as one is. One can perform good actions and be kind to others out of compassion, without selfish intention or expectation of “I am doing all these because I want to feel good and meaningful and be happy.”

Be free.

Love dispassionately, desirelessly, compassionately and unconditionally

Whether the past experiences were something good or not good, pleasant or unpleasant, happy or unhappy, desirable or undesirable, let them go.

Whether the future will be okay or not okay, let it be.

Do our best, perform all our duties and responsibilities without forcing ourselves beyond our limitation, and let go the fruit of action.

Live in the present, and whether this present is good or not good, this is also impermanent.

Live as we are, without attachment, identification, craving and aversion, judgment, comparison and expectation.

Love everyone as they are, without attachment, identification, craving and aversion, judgment, comparison and expectation.

Love ourselves, be free from clinging and craving towards love and kindness from others. Allow others to love and be kind to us, or not.

If one knows how to take care oneself, which is taking care of one’s mind and loving oneself, one can love others dispassionately, desirelessly, compassionately and unconditionally. One stops hurting oneself and others, especially those whom we think we love and whom are in a relationship with us.

Be free.

Seeing the truth in ourselves that is not necessarily what we would like it to be, is a great liberation

It’s common for someone to feel hurt, dissatisfaction and disappointment in a love relationship. That is because we think we love the person in the relationship with us, but we don’t.

When we think we are hurt, dissatisfied and disappointed because of his/her bad treatment to us or wrongful behavior, we will do and say things that would hurt/attack this person in the relationship with us. We would go behind his/her back complaining about him/her for this and that, telling other people, especially our family and friends about how bad he/she is. Meanwhile, we keep telling ourselves and other people, “I love him/her so much. I am so good to him/her. How could he/she do this and didn’t do that, to me. He/she doesn’t love me. I feel so disappointed and hurt.”

‘Hurt’ doesn’t exist if we truly love someone. If we truly love him/her as he/she is, we won’t do and say things that would hurt him/her even though he/she doesn’t love us and isn’t nice to us. We won’t expect him/her to treat us or behave in certain ways. He/she has the freedom to love us, or not, and to be nice to us, or not. And we have the freedom to decide whether to continue this relationship, or not, without feeling hurt or disappointed.

If we ever feel ‘hurt’ by someone whom we think we love very much, it actually tells us that we don’t really love that person, but we only love our selfish desires of what we like and want. The fact that we feel dissatisfied, disappointed and hurt is because our selfish desires are not being gratified from loving the one whom we think we love very much. We are dissatisfied and disappointed is because we are not getting what we like and want, but we are getting what we don’t like and don’t want. It’s not because he/she is bad or wrong. It’s not because he/she doesn’t love us or isn’t nice to us.

To fall in love with someone is not so difficult, but, to truly love someone beyond selfish desires, is very rare.

The realization of “I think I love you and I want to love you, but I realized I don’t really love you because I don’t love you as you are.” allows us to be free from the corrupted thinking and feeling of “I am disappointed and hurt by the one whom I love very much.” Instead, we question ourselves, “How could I demand anything from you or expect you to love me and be nice to me while I don’t really love you?” and “If I really love you, I won’t demand anything from you and won’t expect you to love me and be nice to me. I’ll love you as you are, no matter you love me, or not, and want to be nice to me, or not.”

This will free us from dissatisfaction, disappointment and hurt, even though the person in the relationship doesn’t love us or isn’t nice to us. Meanwhile, even though we love someone very much, as he/she is, we don’t have to allow someone who doesn’t love us and who is not nice to us to take our love for granted, we can let go this person and this relationship.

Seeing the truth in ourselves that is not necessarily what we would like it to be, is a great liberation.

It’s okay if we realize we don’t love someone, as long as we are aware of it and are being truthful and honest towards ourselves and the one whom we think we love, but not really. And this confrontation with the truth allows us to truly love this person, by freeing ourselves from corrupted thinking and feelings.

The end of ignorance, is peace.

Be free.

 

Observe all the names and forms as they are

The worldly restless impure egoistic minds keep looking for stimulation of inputs and outputs.

It doesn’t like to observe names and forms as they are.

It projects quality and duality onto all the perceived names and forms based on its likes and dislikes influencing by its thinking and belief.

Through remembering what it perceived or what it knows, it judges, compares and expects.

It clings, craves, rejects, agrees, disagrees, wants, doesn’t want, creates and destroys.

It has many forms of desires and great ambitions.

There’s aspiration and intention to perform actions and inactions motivated by its desires and ambitions.

It has ‘passionate’ aspiration and intention to ‘share’ what it knows and has, and ‘share’ what others know and have.

There’s nothing wrong with that, just that the mind is not free.

Even the mind that projects ‘good’ and ‘kind’ quality onto itself, desires to be ‘good and kind’ and thinking ‘positively and optimistically’, and performing good and kind actions to benefit the world, is not necessarily be free from selfishness. The one who thinks “I am not selfish. I want to be unselfish.” and recognizing other people are being selfish, is not necessarily be free from selfishness.

“I want the world to be good and I want to make the world good, so that I and my loved ones can have a good world to live in and have a good life.”

It’s everyone’s freedom for what they want to think and believe, and what they want to do with their life existence.

Silent the restless mind, abandon ‘positive thinking’ and ‘optimism’, be free from desires, and even the desire to be free from suffering, if one truly wishes to realize yoga.

Positive thinking and optimism is just an counteract for ‘negative thinking’ and ‘hopelessness’. It’s not the truth nor the end of suffering.

If ‘God’ exists, ‘God’ doesn’t have intention to make anyone or anything to be good or bad, positive or negative, happy or unhappy.

There’s neither positive nor negative, neither good nor bad, neither happiness nor unhappiness, neither elation nor depression.

Dharma doesn’t need to be shared, if one knows Dharma.

Peace and love doesn’t need to be shared, if one knows peace and love.

Be free from aspiration and intention, if one truly wants to realize yoga.

Don’t be ambitious.

‘Sharing’, ‘connecting’, ‘giving’ and ‘receiving’ are reflections of separateness.

‘Sharing’, ‘connecting’, ‘giving’ and ‘receiving’ don’t exist in oneness.

Who is sharing with whom? Who is connecting with whom? Who is giving? Who is receiving?

Be free.

Wisdom vs intelligence and accumulated worldly knowledge

Wisdom reflects peace and freedom from suffering. Meanwhile intelligence and accumulated worldly knowledge in a person doesn’t necessarily guarantee that one will be peaceful or free from suffering.

One doesn’t need to know ‘the knowledge of how to build a house’ to have peace and be free from suffering. Knowing ‘the knowledge of how to build a house’ doesn’t guarantee that one will be peaceful and free from suffering. Though one can use ‘the knowledge of how to build a house’ to benefit oneself and others. Being a doctor with the knowledge of medicine and all kinds of illnesses, and using this knowledge to be doing something useful for one’s and others’ health condition also doesn’t guarantee that one will be peaceful and free from suffering. Being a psychologist with the knowledge of psychology and all kinds of psychological illnesses, and using this knowledge to benefit oneself and others also doesn’t guarantee that one will be peaceful and free from suffering.

Intelligence and accumulated worldly knowledge is neither good nor bad and it can be used for something good or bad, and it’s uncorrelated with peace and wisdom.

Wisdom is one with peace. They manifest in oneness.

When there’s peace, there’s wisdom. When there’s wisdom, there’s peace. And vice versa.

Whenever one finds ‘peace’ in any particular quality of name and form, or experience, or action and inaction, or the result of action and inaction, or object, or space, or place, or condition, or situation, then very soon this ‘peace’ will change and disappear.

It’s the same as compassion is uncorrelated with ‘love’ towards the world and the worldly names and forms.

People talk about ‘love the world’ and ‘love for peace in the world’. But without wisdom, this ‘love’ towards ‘love the world’ and ‘love for peace in the world’ is merely a form of attachment and affection (derived from ignorance and egoism) towards worldly names and forms that are impermanent. Out of ‘love’ towards the world and desiring ‘peace that we want’ in the world, people ‘desire’ to make the world to be the way that how we would love it to be, and would ‘destroy’ any ‘obstruction towards having the world to be the way that how we would love it to be’ at any cost. The by-products of this love towards ‘love for the world’ and ‘love for peace in the world’ is restlessness – a mixture of happiness/satisfaction/meaningfulness/peacefulness/victory (when the world and the worldly names and forms that one loves are the way that how one would love it to be) and unhappiness/dissatisfaction/meaninglessness/peacelessness/failure (when the world and the worldly names and forms that one loves are not the way that how one would love it to be).

Out of ‘love’ towards what we believe as ‘peacefulness’, ‘kindness’, ‘good’ and ‘right’, we ‘hate’ what we believe as ‘peacelessness’, ‘evilness’, ‘bad’ and ‘wrong’. ‘Hating’ what we believe as ‘peacelessness’, ‘evilness’, ‘bad’ and ‘wrong’ is nothing to do with compassion. Compassion is not about ‘accepting’, ‘allowing’ and ‘supporting’ what we believe as ‘peacelessness’, ‘evilness’, ‘bad’ and ‘wrong’ either. But, it’s freedom from the ‘suffering’ of ‘hatred’, ‘anger’, ‘dissatisfaction’, ‘disappointment’, ‘craving’, ‘aversion’, ‘hurt’, ‘regret’, ‘guilt’, ‘violence’, ‘ill-will’, ‘ill-thinking’, ‘animosity’, ‘offensiveness’, ‘defensiveness’, ‘obsessiveness’, ‘possessiveness’, ‘fear’ and ‘worry’, being undetermined or undisturbed by what we believe as ‘peacelessness’, ‘evilness’, ‘bad’ and ‘wrong’.

The wise abandon ‘love’ towards the world of worldly names and forms that are impermanent, but resting in unconditional peace of wisdom and compassion.

Be free.